Monday, June 26, 2017

Lawn Care Ruminations




Sunday morning began with me looking out my kitchen window and struggling to convince myself that my backyard didn't need cutting. Usually this early in the summer I can get away with cutting one yard a weekend and I did the back just last Sunday. Unfortunately something is different this year, not sure if it's the heavier rainfall we've had but as I walked outside on my deck to take a closer look, it was apparent that if I didn't cut the backyard I'd have a jungle the following weekend. A further mystery is the fact that except for a few dandelions, my front yard didn't need to be cut although its already been two weeks it was mowed.

So like a good suburban drone I inserted the headphones attached to my MP3 player into my ears, cranked up the mower, and proceeded walk up and down my yard pushing a ridiculous device that I am sure will be a joke to future generations. I'm sure climate change and simple innovation will eventually make gas powered lawnmowers antiquated relics. Battery powered lawnmowers are already for sale and if I had five hundred dollars I could risk on such a new technology, I'd already have bought one just so I would not have to deal with the frustration of their gas powered counterparts. I know the problems I've had with lawnmowers are from a lack of proper care on my part, but I'll be damned those things weren't as complicated back when I pushed my Granddad's around the neighborhood to earn a few bucks cutting other peoples' grass.

Ideally, and call me insane, I'd like to see the demise of the modern subdivision and have them replaced with a more communal lifestyle. I've heard of a few places like that already exist, it's not an apartment nor condo situation because these new neighborhoods are made up of individual, freestanding family homes but the green spaces have a more open, park-like feel. The homes in these new types of neighborhoods are also much smaller than the Mcmansions many Americans have come to believe are rights enshrined in the Constitution. That right there will have some running off screaming socialism but if I could buy into such a place go ahead and start addressing me as comrade. 

Yes, this means lawn care of the grounds would be relegated down to a contractor or in the future, battery powered robots that would perform their duties without human interaction. Yes, all this pondering is just me whining about having to take care of something I bought back when I was too stupid to realize how demanding lawn care could be.

All told it only took me forty-five minutes to cut the backyard and the small segment on the other side of the fence. Yes, I did come away with a small feeling of accomplishment. Both the backyard and side yard looked better but any satisfaction was short lived, because as I kicked back with a cold soda I realized that I will most certainly have to do the same damn thing next weekend.

It has been said that the definition of insanity is to perform the same act over and over again expecting a different result. How lawn care plays into that idea I'll leave that to each individual to decide. I'm sure everyone can already guess where I fall on that answer.

4 comments:

Harry Hamid said...

I've thought about how insane lawn care seems. My grandparents used to spend nearly all of their days figuring out how to landscape and mow their yard in the best way possible. Their lives basically revolved around it at one point.

I live in a townhouse where there's only enough "yard" to take a weed wacker to every couple weeks, and of course, we have someone to do that for us...

But still, maybe the compromise is what they do in Phoenix: They have front yards, but rather than grass, they're filled with rocks.

The Bug said...

I have a friend in Cincinnati whose yard was very shady, so she pulled out all the grass & put in stuff that didn't need mowing & liked shade (rocks, moss, etc.). It looked really cool, but her neighbors objected. (Insert angry emoticon here)

Fortunately I view mowing as an opportunity to get some much needed exercise. It's making me sad to watch Mike get all of "my" exercise this summer! But I have a sedentary job & you don't!

Marja said...

Lol love the picture. We have a bit of a break here as it is winter so not much grass growing going on. Love the idea of communal gardens In the Netherlands they already setup projects with communal housing and gardens but nor robots :)

Pixel Peeper said...

When I worked part-time a few years ago, I took over the mowing. I pretended I was at the gym exercising. Hey, you do what you gotta do. When I started working full-time again, we finally gave in and hired a guy to do our lawn. He does the bushes and trees, too, and I have to admit it all looks a lot better now.

Best money spent ever.

If your son is there with you, you should make him mow!