Wednesday, September 15, 2010

I don't find this stuff amusing anymore.....



Now updated for your pleasure.

You know I'm daily feeling less and less welcome in my own country which curiously enough is acting like a cartoon in a cartoon grave yard. Maybe it’s all the mutts, my short attention span, long nights, and lack of a role model because he ducked out some alley with some roly-poly bat face girl. All along there were hints and allegations, incidents and accidents far away from my well-lit door. Hell, I know I'm soft in the middle but I want my photo opportunity and shot at redemption. Dear God, what if I die here?
But I feel like I am walking down a strange street in the Third World. Its my first time around and I don’t speak the language, hold no currency and I am surrounded by the sounds of cattle in the market place and I see angels in the architecture spinning in infinity.
I guess I need a bodyguard, I could call him Betty and I would be his long lost pal Al.

Tea Party-Backed Candidate Christine O'Donnell's War on Masturbation
"The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery. So you can't masturbate without lust," she said. "The reason that you don't tell [people] that masturbation is the answer to AIDS and all these other problems that come with sex outside of marriage is because, again, it is not addressing the issue. You're just gonna create somebody who is, I was gonna say, toying with his sexuality. Pardon the pun."





20 comments:

Laura said...

I sensed shades of Randal in this post. LOL It took me a second to see where you were going and then I was like.. "Ooooooo! I get it now." :)

What a wack job this broad is. No pun intended. ;p

((Hugs))
Laura

lime said...

i am speechless. holy cow. i think i need to go rub one out just for spite now.

btw, tag, you're it...

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

What is it with these far-right female politicians? The SOBs can't even talk right. This one used the word, exasperated, when she should have used exacerbated...........Sorry, I'm probably being a little overly picky, huh? Hey, at least she was able to stand upright.

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

And didn't Michele Bachman actually tout this woman as the "next Governor of Delaware"? She didn't even know what office that the woman was running for. Incredible.

deafmutes said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Commander Zaius said...

Sunshine: Thanks you but you might want to go apologize to Randal comparing his work to my strange meanderings.

Lime: It what I get for decontructing American politics in my head. The results are often like that face hugger critter from Aliens.

Will: Yeah, knuckle dragging is so unattractive. You have to excuse Michelle, she can't help but be confused.

Allen: HEY Cousin, still planning to come down your way Saturday. That is if Miss Wiggles does not haev another nuclear melt down like she did last night. Denied her a donut since she did not eat her dinner and Linda Blair suddenly showed up.

Tim said...

When I say,I might move to Canada,I really do mean it.
Are these elected officials public servants...
Then why don't they have to take a test for the job before they are given the okay to do so. Every other civil servant has to take a qualifications test.
That would have eliminated W...
I think I need a nap..

Randal Graves said...

Wait. Are you saying that you're *pro* masturbation?

I can't believe that you're willing to murder all those lives. Sob.

Commander Zaius said...

Tim: This stuff makes my head hurt, saw a film clip of the O'Connell chick on "Politically Incorrect" from 1998 and she was making the point that lying was so bad she would not even lie to a bunch of Nazis at her hypothetical door to save some Jews hiding in her attic. She said "God" would supply her a way out of the situation. That theory sure as hell didn't hold up for millions during WW2, I wonder why the Big Chief upstairs would make an exception for her?

Top it all off Scarborough on his show this morning was totally busting her out for lying about her college record, taxes, and a couple of other things.

As for expatriating yeah, this shit is getting deep and does not look to end anytime soon. Totally serious here, looked into Australia and unless someone over 35 has $750,000 lying around they ain't going to take us. Chile is a possibility as is the Dominican Republic, although its a little too close the United States and I figure if the Teabaggers take over they may well want to "spread Democracy."

Randal: LOL!!! Never thought I could be called a murderer of millions but...

okjimm said...

// daily feeling less and less welcome in my own country //

cool. Thinking of starting my own. Shot&a beer gets you in.

Commander Zaius said...

Okjimm: It's a deal!

Dragon Lady said...

I have talked to some democrats and they think that we will prevail, but I worry that too many of the liberals and progressives who feel that we didn't go far enough with Obama trying to be bipartisan will not realize they have to get to the polls and vote to keep these idiots out. For the first time in my life I am putting my money where my mouth is and donating to politicians who stand for what I believe in here at home and also to others. Besides being totally bewildered by the Tea parties who are my age and are out there voting in the very people that want to take away our Medicare and SS! It all boils down to religion and the dominist who want to run our country. And I realize I've started ranting so I will stop now.

Life As I Know It Now said...

Hi Beach. It is getting crazy in this country. I HOPE it is a mistake the conservatives are making and that the republican party fractures. Then we could elect more democrats to office and DEMAND they act like democrats and pass legislation that benefits the people rather than corporations/the wealthy.

Well anyway, I do like to dream!

Joe "Truth 101" Kelly said...

I was thinking my first edict as Ayatollah would be to condemn anti masterbaters for hypocrisy.

Don't even tell me that Ms. O'Donnell never once let her fingers do the walking.


I do feel bad for the millions of unused sperms that end up on paper towels and unused zygotes that end up being flushed down the toilet Randall.

Marja said...

Mmmmm My kids used up the internet as they couldn't go to school for a while (there is a cap here on internet. We don't have much people here) I can't therefore play the video. I don't mind when I read the intro. We might be back here with internet but that is better than that middle age stuff

TomCat said...

Just make sure that nobody gives her a dildo. She might get sane. ;-)

Unknown said...

Al,
in the long run, and in the short run, I'm with you.
Love,
Betty.

Dave Dubya said...

I'm having trouble seeing the video. I must have made myself go blind.

Commander Zaius said...

Dragon Lady: Its a sad situation that does not have any prospects of getting better.

Liberality: I would very much like to see the republicans crack up, I do believe we need two healthy political parties but a commonsense republican is as rare as a dodo bird.

Truthmeni: I busted out laughing today seeing O'Donnell talking about her involvement in witchcraft and something about being on a satanic altar. Of course the republicans will down play it but if a democrat had done that...

Marja: Its just my silly ramblings, nothing I haven't done before.

Tomcat: That kind of crazy don't get better, no matter what.

Gwen: LOL!!

Dave: Yeah, my eyesight is real bad too.

Dragon Lady said...

Beach ... if you haven't already read this blog I think you might find it interesting. http://godsownparty.com/blog/