Damn it Jim, its a new Star Trek movie.

Holy warp drive, phasers, and antimatter! The Hollywood establishment might have made a Star Trek movie that may actually be worth the eight dollar ticket. Getting seriously Trek nerdy here but for years I lived off the adventures of Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and Scotty. Rerun after freaking rerun I gladly watched Kirk bag the hot alien chick, Spock deal with his interstellar mother issues, McCoy tell everyone time and time again that he was a doctor damn it, and Scotty rig up the warp drive like a Christmas tree to get just a little more warp power. Of course I lusted after Uhura like you wouldn't believe, but I just will not go into that.

Then Roddenberry had to bring in the Next Generation crew and while they were good for a few laughs I just couldn't feel the same about them since Picard had to have a staff meeting to discuss implications for the Federation if he took a crap while on patrol next the neutral zone, and turning over the Enterprise to Riker was sure fire way to get the ship blown up or at least taken over by hostile aliens. I swear there were times I wished Worf would have gone all Klingon on them sometimes. Especially after the last three Next Generation movies that frankly I wish someone could tell me didn't seriously suck on all counts. And don't get me started on Wesley Crusher, if that character wasn't a reason to root for the Borg to collectivize the whole lot then I'm a primate's uncle.


For those wondering no, I do not have a stash of Star Trek toys, I got rid of them a few years ago but I do still have my plastic Vulcan ears. Long live and prosper, y'all.