For quite awhile my blogging time has been seriously restricted with my son, Darth Spoilboy, burning up our still fairly recently installed DSL line by spending time on his MySpace and Facebook page communicating with his friends. Even when I found the computer unused and Spoilboy off at a friend's house either playing X-box360 or Playstation 3 as soon as I found time to sit down with some idea percolating in my head Spoilboy would invariably show up looking over my shoulder and asking a whole range of questions on many different subjects until whatever idea I might have had evaporated into oblivion. I usually then just surrendered the computer and either found something to read or tried to find something halfway intelligent to watch on television. Either way I would soon hear Spoilboy tapping away at the keyboard and only stopping once he had hit the upper limit on his bedtime.
His friends he stays connected to through the internet are both far away and local, male and female. Both Dragonwife and myself overview his communications but leave him a degree of privacy after a point. His local friends have the advantage of calling the house at certain times, normally when I absolutely won't surrender the computer, and due to our knowledge of who he communicates with we haven't been surprised to receive a large uptake in the number of calls with the voice of a young female at the other end. More accurately I haven't been surprised, Dragonwife on the other hand has not taken the phones calls from young ladies asking for our son with the nonchalance that I have. Spoilboy had his "first date" sometime ago escorted by the girl's father to some church function but that was more a friends activity than a boy/girl date where attraction played a factor. None the less it had Dragonwife bewildered and thankfully relieved when it didn't happen again.
All that changed just last Friday when Dragonwife came running into the house after returning home from work almost screaming for me to run to the window to see what MY son was doing. When he left just minutes before he told me that he was going walking with friends, one of them being his video game buddy Luke. Looking out the window with Dragonwife almost hyperventilating I saw that Luke and he had joined up with two young girls with my son and one of the girls each having wrapped one of their arms around each other's waist and were walking very close together. His return to the house a couple of hours later had Dragonwife frantic over what was now HER son and how we should have a talk with him concerning what to do and not to do with girls. Spoilboy and I had that talk long before and frankly I was somewhat bewildered then to find out my young dude already knew far more about certain subjects than I did at the same age. Amongst the talk that evening about girls with Dragonwife breaking open the medicinal wine cooler to calm her nerves we learned that the kids wanted to go to a movie Sunday night. Supposedly one of the two girls would have their mom at the movie to watch over the youngins so nothing out the ordinary would have a chance to transpire.
The rest of the weekend went as expected and Sunday evening I dropped Spoilboy and Luke at the local theater were they quickly linked up with two girls waiting nearby with an older looking women hovering not far away. As the two boys walked away from the starship I was driving I saw my son reach into his pocket and apply lip balm to his mouth with Luke and him soon laughing over something said between them. When I got home I didn't say anything to my wife even though warning bells were going off. I returned to the theater at the prescribed time and found Spoilboy and his lady friend already outside waiting. As much as my son tried to dunk around a column to hide I still saw the young girl and my son lip lock in the extreme with me almost jumping out the car to break up a rather heavy exchange given their age. I guess my son sensing my unease soon came running up to the car and jumped in with the young girl waving to him as we left. The question I asked him was unbelievably rhetorical but some glitch in my brain couldn't help me from asking it. So when I asked him "Well how did it go?" the poop eating grin I received in turn I have to admit I found quite unsettling more so when he pulled out the lip balm and put more on. Now some may wonder what I told his mother once we returned home. Being perfectly honest I want to sleep some tonight so I haven't and probably won't say a word. Hell, I'm having an enough of a hard time accepting that the baby who I saw pop out of his mom has truly now moved into a whole new phase of life. For our own sakes we might tell Dragonwife a year or two from now or when he becomes engaged what I'm sure is still many years from now. There are just some things better kept hidden to protect sanity, life and limb.
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(Pedro Molina, Counterpoint)
(Luke McGarry, @lukeymcgarry)
(Jeff Darcy, Cleveland Plain Dealer)
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19 minutes ago
18 comments:
sigh... while i completely understand and sympathize with your concerns, a part of me just silently yells "You go, Darth Spoilboy!"
I'm so juvenile.
ugh...i hear you. just last night i picked my 14 yr old up from a church function. i arrived in time to see her link her arms around a boy's neck and plant a juicy and somewhat lingering kiss on him, which was reciprocated with enthusiasm. no real attempt at even hiding what was going on.
I'm with colonel colonel. Go Darth Spoilboy! BTW, did you get the kid some condoms when you had that all important talk?
Colonel: Yeah, as much as Dragonwife and myself are a bit off balance with this new stage I am proud of my boy and his way with the ladies.
Lime: I still have a hard time when I realize that just a few years ago Spoilboy biggest concern was Power Rangers.
Utah: Not yet, and for the life of me I can't imagine how Dragonwife would act if the subject was brought up. And yes he and I did cover that issue.
hmmm they eventually grow up ha.
:)
Keshi.
I love that one of the labels for this post is "lip balm!"
Evolution at home.. We all evolve..You as a father witnessing and adjusting to your kid's evolution as a son!
Good for you Darth! Now let me give you just a few tips on how to handle women........:-) :-)
Great story and good decision to not tell Dragonwife BB. Women just don't understand these things:-)
Keshi: Yeah, and the story continues. For reasons Spoilboy won't tell or doesn't know the girl he went out with broke up with him for some reason. Spoilboy was in a sad mood yesterday with me doing my best to tell him that there were many more fish in the sea. But, as I found out yesterday, good old dad finally lost all his residual "coolness" and my words were falling on deaf ears. Today he is in a far better mood and seems over the girl.
E: My back story on that is that the two days before the date he was having a fit to have some lip balm for chapped lips but really he wanted to be "ready" for her.
Nitu: Welcome and come back often. I have also listed you on my links. Yes, my son's evolution has been an amazing, funny, and sometimes fearful segment of my life. His first twelve years have been a blast but I must admit to some trepidation on the teenagers which loom over me.
MadMike: Dragonwife was very upset to see Spoilboy so affected by the girl breaking up with him. She may cause more issues in the long run than him.
Ahhhh yes. The fun begins. I remember it well.
thats good to hear BB. He'll be ok...u know the drift duncha LOL!
btw come shed some light on my current topic.
Keshi.
Doesn't it just freak you out when you find out how much they know at such a young age? I know my step-daughter FLOORED me with some of the stuff she already knew.
ty BB n I've replied to ya :)
Keshi.
Mike: I can see lots of tequila in my future as I deal with Spoilboy's and later Wiggles' dating adventures.
Keshi: The next day he seemed to be over her. Only say seven more years of this stuff until he gets out of college.
Stacy: At some point that I never saw coming I got left behind in the social wilderness. I hate to ask the question but when did kids learn so much so fast? No wait I may just not want to know.
Keshi: Checked it out today.
Lovely story Beach Bum -- babies grow up so fast nowadays we 'oldies' can't keep up. I guess our parents said the same thing about us too.
haha yes!
Keshi.
Hillblogger: Yes, but the thought have given me little comfort.
Keshi: I could really use a hug, internet type, from you. Its been a bad weekend.
Great story...
interesting post...
Thanks for sharing......
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Melvin
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