(Author's note: The following is all true, really I mean ever word. Now it did not happen all at one time.)
There is an old saying that in this infinite universe no matter how rare and unlikely an event might be as long as it is not absolutely proven impossible it has probably occurred somewhere. Such was the case one Saturday morning when I crawled out of bed to find that my wife had not left me a weekend “Honey-Do” list before she and the kids drove off to her mom’s house. Do not misunderstand me, I had absolutely no desire to be bound to the stifling suburban domicile I find myself living like some oppressed medieval serf. It is just that the idea of my wife forgetting to write down a list of “productive” or “substantial” tasks for me to do over the weekend is akin to the sun not rising in the east and bears collectively deciding as a species to poop someplace others than the woods.
Diane looked thoughtful for a moment trying to think of something significant to say. “Maybe you have inadvertently stepped through a crack in the space-time continuum and entered a parallel universe where you never existed. Some people have the ability to walk across different dimensions as easily as a regular person enters a room.” She said in all seriousness actually looking concerned. “I can perceive ripples in space-time and this area is full of them, “she went on to say. I fell in love with her on the spot although she was way too young for me.
Trying not to be cynical here but going to sound like it anyway there does seem some justice in the universe that most couples like them usually end up hating each other after the real world smacks them in the face. Fairy tale love just cannot stand the pressures of mortgages, medical bills, stressful jobs, and young children always demanding their parents full attention and time. Standing there in front of them it was evident that this couple had beat the odds, which I had to grudgingly admire.
We talked for several minutes going over our respective histories after high school when they both chimed in that seeing me was like seeing a real ghost. “I don’t understand, what do you mean by that?" I asked.
“Yeah,” the guy laughed along with his wife. “A rumor went around a few years back during one of the reunions that you were dead.” On that note, I decided it was time to go home.